Cultivating a Healthy Relationship with Social Media

I recently stepped away from social media, and this blog, for over a month. It wasn’t intentional at first. I was traveling, working hard to finish my last semester of classes, and processing a lot of change in my life. Creating content and being present on the internet naturally fell to the wayside because I just didn’t have the time or energy to give. As I slowly ease back into it, I want to share my perspective and the actions I take to make my relationship with social media a healthy one.

My time away allowed me to tune more deeply into myself without the influence of everyone else’s thoughts. Social media platforms clutter our brains with much more information than we’re intended to process each day. In a matter of minutes, we can scroll through a feed and see the content that hundreds of people are putting out. It can be distracting and have a negative impact on our mental health if we let it. But I believe that using social media mindfully and intentionally has the potential to be a positive tool in our lives.

The importance of intentional content consumption and creation

When we aimlessly scroll through social media feeds, we’re wasting our time, disconnecting from the present moment, and training ourselves to tune out and mindlessly consume. It is the most unproductive use of time that I can think of, and it certainly doesn’t have a positive impact on our mental health.

One of the blocks that prompted my social media break in the first place was the question of what my place is in all of this. What do I have to offer? What is my intention behind sharing and consuming content on these platforms? What am I getting out of it, and is it benefiting me in a positive, meaningful way? I think these are questions that we should all be asking ourselves, because diving deep into our intention behind social media use allows us to become more conscious and get a lot more out of it. 

We all have unique perspectives, experiences, and personalities to share. We all have something meaningful to contribute. And these platforms allow us to engage with people all over the world that we may never have met otherwise. When we have purpose behind our actions, we can use social media to inspire, be inspired, learn, grow, and connect.

Here are some of the things I do to keep my social media use positive and intentional:

1. Control who you follow. This one made all the difference for me. Look at every single one of the accounts you follow and ask yourself WHY. Are they bringing you inspiration, motivating you, making you think, challenging your mindset, or contributing to your growth? If not, unfollow them. Any accounts that aren’t doing something for you are just adding to the content you see and sift through every day. For me, it’s an ongoing process of sorting through, questioning, and cutting down. Reducing the number of accounts I follow reduces the amount of content I see, which reduces the amount of time I spend on the app. And if you’re only following content that benefits you in some way, you’re more likely to benefit from the time you spend on social media.

2. Think before you post. I think it’s important to ask ourselves what our intentions are behind everything we post. This is what hung me up at first and stopped me from sharing at all, because I questioned what I have to offer. But we are all worthy of sharing our experiences, we just need to get clear on why. Post when you genuinely want to and feel called to share – not because you think you should. Posting content just to post won’t benefit anyone. When I released the need to gain followers and likes, it took away the pressure around social media and freed me to share authentically. Without all the unnecessary pressure, I feel a lot more inspired to create and share.

3. Set limits. Decide how much time you can feel good about dedicating to social media each day. I actually set limits on my phone to make sure I stay on track. If you have an iPhone, you can go to Settings > Screen Time > App Limits and choose categories (like social networking) or specific apps and set the amount of time you want to limit yourself to. It will let you know when you have 5 minutes left then essentially “lock” the app when you reach the limit. I primarily use Instagram, so I have a 1-hour limit set for the app every day. I started out with 2 hours and used to have a hard time sticking to it, but now I naturally stay under the time I set for myself. I also limit my screen time in the mornings and evenings to give myself time to wake up and wind down without the influence of social media.

4. Turn off notifications. I turned off social media notifications a long time ago, and it makes a big difference. Instead of having notifications pop up and being tempted to open the app over and over again all day, it gives you the freedom to forget about social media and only open it when you have a solid intention or something to accomplish. We don’t need to be notified when we have new followers, likes, or anything else. It just feeds more of our attention to these apps and causes us to open them more often (which leads to the mindless scroll).

5. Be mindful and intentional. Don’t open the app without having a clear intention of what you want to accomplish. Whether it’s posting, answering messages, or consciously consuming and engaging with others, set an intention to avoid falling into the mindless scroll. It can be tempting to open social media when we’re bored, as a distraction, or just out of habit. Ask yourself why you’re using it and keep yourself accountable. I promise that when you do, your mind will feel clearer and the time you do spend on social media will be more meaningful.

It comes down to this: social media is what you make it.

How we use it, consume it, and view it will determine its effect on us and whether it becomes a positive resource or a detriment to our mental health. If we are consciously using these platforms to connect with others and genuinely express ourselves, I believe social media can be a useful resource for inspiration, expression, and connection. I have met some amazing people in real life that I never would have known if we hadn’t crossed paths in this crazy online world. I’m still easing back into it and finding my place, but I love how these platforms expose us to new perspectives, people, places, and ideas – it’s a constant learning experience. Like anything else, our mindset towards social media will directly affect what we get out of it.